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Mickey Mouse visits his lawyer one day. He says to his lawyer, "Tell me, whats the current status with the divorce to Minnie?"
His Lawyer replies, "Well I've got to tell you Mickey, I have a bit of a problem with your case. You can't just divorce your wife because she's stupid."
Mickey turns to him and says "I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said she was ****ing Goofy!" [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
\"Aren\'t you a little short for a stormtrooper?\" <br />~~Star Wars<br /><a href=\"http://Community.webshots.com/user/orangebird01\" target=\"_blank\">Orange Bird01 </a>
Originally posted by 98v6:
How do you stop superman?
just tip over his wheel chair...
What's better than winning a silver medal in the special olympics?
Not being retarded....
Holy crap, i haven't told those since like sophomore year and i got ISS for them then...
LOL love the superman joke....
ive heard different versions of the special olypmics....whats better than winning the Gold in the special olympics? Being able to walk
\"Aren\'t you a little short for a stormtrooper?\" <br />~~Star Wars<br /><a href=\"http://Community.webshots.com/user/orangebird01\" target=\"_blank\">Orange Bird01 </a>
How do you get a one arm blonde off a tree?
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Wave to her [img]graemlins/wavey.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
\"Aren\'t you a little short for a stormtrooper?\" <br />~~Star Wars<br /><a href=\"http://Community.webshots.com/user/orangebird01\" target=\"_blank\">Orange Bird01 </a>
Originally posted by OrangeBird: How do you get a one arm blonde off a tree?
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Wave to her [img]graemlins/wavey.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
Originally posted by OrangeBird: Mickey Mouse visits his lawyer one day. He says to his lawyer, "Tell me, whats the current status with the divorce to Minnie?"
His Lawyer replies, "Well I've got to tell you Mickey, I have a bit of a problem with your case. You can't just divorce your wife because she's stupid."
Mickey turns to him and says "I'm sorry, you must have misunderstood me. I said she was ****ing Goofy!" [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
hahahah thats a good one [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img] [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
An older Jewish gentleman marries a younger lady and they are very much in love.
However, no
matter what the husband does sexually, the woman never achieves orgasm. Since a
Jewish wife is
entitled to sexual pleasure, they decide to ask the rabbi.
The rabbi listens to their story, strokes his beard, and makes the following
suggestion.; "Hire
a strapping young man. While the two of you are making love, have the young man
wave a towel
over you. That will help the wife fantasize and should bring on an orgasm"
They go home and follow the rabbi's advice. They hire a handsome young man and
he waves a towel
over them as they make love. But it doesn't help and she is still unsatisfied.
Perplexed, they
go back to the rabbi.
"Okay", says the rabbi, "let's try it reversed.; Have the young man make love to
your wife and
you wave the towel over them."
Once again, they follow the rabbi's advice.; The young man gets into bed with
the wife and the
husband waves the towel The young man gets to work with great enthusiasm and the
wife soon has
an enormous, room-shaking screaming orgasm.
The husband smiles, looks at the young man and says to him triumphantly, "You
see, THAT'S the
way to wave a towel!!"
No offense to any jewish memmbers here [img]graemlins/rofl.gif[/img]
\"Aren\'t you a little short for a stormtrooper?\" <br />~~Star Wars<br /><a href=\"http://Community.webshots.com/user/orangebird01\" target=\"_blank\">Orange Bird01 </a>
An old man is having his medical checkup Then the doctor asked the old man, "Do you have any medical concerns you would like to ask me about?"
"In fact, I do," said the old man. "After I have sex with my wife, the first time I am usually hot and sweaty, and then, after I have sex with her the second time, I am usually cold and chilly."
After examining his wife, an elderly lady, the doctor said, "Everything appears to be fine. Do you have any medical concerns that you would like to discuss with me?"
The lady replied that she had no questions or concerns.
The doctor then asked, "Your husband had an unusual concern. He claims that he is usually hot and sweaty after having sex the first time with you and then cold and chilly after the second time. Do you know why?"
"Oh, yes," she replied. "That's because the first time is usually around July and the second time is usually in December."
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